Run Forest Run!

I haven't told a lot of people this yet, but I started running about a month ago. Running is one of those things to me that always just seemed impossible. Even back when I was a 2 legged little-leaguer I hated running so much. After I lost my leg at 10 I never really tried too hard. Maybe sometimes during recess I would try to run to play football or basketball. But I could never imagine myself running track or anything like that. Not that I wasn't athletic. I swam varsity through most of high school and was active in martial arts and skateboarding. But running was just always one of those things.

For some reason last month I decided to give it a try. I don't know how it is for other amputees, but for me its such a trial. I have so many problems with my leg sweating and slipping, but I'm learning to work with them and slowly getting better.

In the beginning, I started off at just 1 mile. I've been slowly working my way up and am now at 3.5 miles. I'm taking this as a personal challenge in my life. My goal is to run at least a half marathon next summer. I would prefer a full marathon, but we'll see.

My goal for the month of may is to work my way up to 5 miles. And by the end of the summer I want to be at 10.

Halfstep in full effect, don't sleep :)

Soul Society 2011

The International Soul Society Festival 2011 was a huge success. If you missed it, I feel sorry for you. The past week was full of culture, friends, and great shows. I am blessed to have been a part of the events. There were so many talented artists from all elements of this culture.

From the beginning our goal has been to serve the DC community and provide an environment of cultural exchange. Every year we work diligently to accomplish that goal. For me personally it was a weekend full of hard work, stress, and as much dance as I could squeeze in to the few moments when I wasn't running around like a crazy man. It may be a stretch to call it work, because I was able to be around so many inspiring people and learn from true masters of their crafts.

Now that I've had a few days to recover and reflect on this wonderful event, I'm ready to attack the world with a new vigor.

Congratulations to the winners of our competitions:
Freestyle Session Qualifiers: Lab Rats Crew
Mighty 4 Qualifier: Hozin
Underground Soul Cypher: Bgirl Maresco

To all those who supported us and this culture, I want to say thank you.

Old man's retrospective

So, one year older and not much wiser lol. It seems the older I get, the less meaningful an actual Birthday feels. I do, however, feel it is important to take some time to reflect on the years as they pass.

This past year was a year of many changes.

This year I saw the end of an era in DC. After so many years of going to the same party, the party that was my gateway into the DC scene, it finally came to and end. It was a surreal moment for me. Thursday nights were so ingrained into me as my night. I got to DJ, dance, and hang out with my friends. It was one of the only times I got to share my music and passion with the rest of the world. Only it seemed that no one really wanted to hear. Commercial music took over and the need for profit overran the need for culture. I'm not too upset about it; its the way the world works. The party had been dwindling for years. I will always remember it as it was at its peak. I'm not sure I would even still be dancing I had never found that party so many years ago.

After that, I lost a lot of my inspiration for DJing. I still played around a little bit, but I hadn't been digging for music in a long time. And my next mix is still long long overdue. For a short time there was little to no music in my life, only what I listened to at practice. With no music there was a void, but what I was listening to wasn't cutting it anymore. So I started to experiment with different music. I started listening to a lot of Jazz and Blues. I even went back to listen to all my favorite metl/alt/punk bands from the 90s. That made me so nostalgic of my days in college with my band so I started playing guitar again. But it was different than before. Before, I had always been happy just learning and playing songs. Now I felt the need to understand music and what I was doing. I had somehow developed a crazy discipline and so I started training hard. I got lost. I was playing 2-3 hours a day, working 8 hours, and bboy training 2 hours. Not a lot of time for any kind of social life. But I felt content anyway.

For a long time I've been withdrawn into myself. I have so many things I feel like I need to accomplish. I don't often feel like being around large groups of people. I rarely ever go to a club. I would be content to just have a few friends over and fix a nice dinner. Maybe I'm getting old who knows. I feel like I'm on the verge of attaining a lot of my goals. I feel like I just need to keep fighting and things will slowly start to work out.

I was blessed in the past year to have the opportunity to travel to Bulgaria, Germany, and Holland. It was a wonderful trip and a much needed break from my routines in life. Its always good to break away so you can gain some perspectives on your life. I met a lot of wonderful people and was greatly inspired. Jam on it in Bulgaria is one of my favorite Jams. Every time I go I'm reminded of why I truly love this culture and what I think this culture should be. I got the chance to hang out with Ken Swift and Forest Gump and hear so many hilarious tales from the early days of bboying in the bronx. I got to see my first battle of the year. It was a unique experience. It was amazing to see so many bboys, an entire city full. I also got to see my father's homeland and eat doner kebab haha. I had a great time relaxing and just being able to spend time with my friends in Stuttgart.

I've been thinking a lot about the future in the past year. I don't know where the future will lead me, but I've been preparing to buy a house. I'm tired of living in apartments. I'm ready to have my own space, build myself a studio and have a true place to call my home. The housing market in DC is so horrible I've had to think about other places. But who knows, that day is still a few years in the future. Maybe things will change before then.

Everything in life moves in circles. For a long time I had closed out a lot of things from myself and the world. Something happened recently that made me face a lot of feelings I was denying myself for years. Some things are difficult to face and some wounds take a long time to heal; especially if you deny them. I don't have all the answers, but I'm ready to face life again.

This next year will be another fulfilling year of many changes. Sometimes I feel like I'm racing a clock, like there's some imaginary line drawn in the sand. In dance, I can already feel my body getting older. But I'm in the best physical condition I've been in years, and I'm not ready to stop any time soon. This is my essence: relentless. I will continue to do my best.

Just some thoughts to end a productive week

This week was pretty good. I've really been focusing on my arts a lot. I'm starting to get more organized with guitar. I started transcribing all the songs I know and am keeping a book now of them so I don't forget everything. I've actually been able to play an hour or two every night and have been able to bboy a few hours every night as well.

I feel like a lot of things in my life are really coming together now. For anyone who doesn't know me well, over the past 6 months I lost like 30 lbs. I'm trying for an extra 10, but its going really slowly. I think I'm getting close to the threshold. I started doing a lot of isometric training outside of bboying and swimming again as well. I think that it has really improved my core and helping me get closer to getting many of the power moves I've been working on for a long time.

Since I started writing again, I decided to go through all my old stuff. It was emotionally overpowering to read everything that was going through me a decade ago. I have come such a far way and never really seen it. But as a person I haven't changed too much since then. I can really see where my drive came from. At that time I was so obsessed with being normal. In that I mean not being handicapped, or at least be able to be perceived the same way as everyone else. I think that will always be one of my biggest driving factors, but since then I've set the bar a lot higher and attack it with 10 times the fury.

There's still a lot from my last post roaming through my mind, but I feel like I'm better able to channel it into something positive now. If you know me you'd never really think it, but I really over-think a lot of things. In some things I am really patient, but in this it comes with great difficulty. Sorry to be so vague.

Today was actually really good for me. I was able to practice guitar for several hours, practice bboying, lift, swim, and even clean out my closet. I also started writing some new stuff to get some things out. I should have done this a long time ago.

Anyway there's still a few hours left in the day to get some more stuff done. Peace out.

~Halfstep

Starting to write again

Last weekend was really bitter sweet for me. It brought back a lot of strong feelings. For a long time, I don't think I've really let myself feel anything. I just keep trucking along, trying to stay busy and grow in everything I do, from guitar, dance, work, DJing, ect ect. Every moment is just the next task, something to keep me creatively busy. Reflecting on it seems I live quite a lonely life, but I've not really noticed. Its amazing sometimes how after so long, people don't really change, and feelings you had over 5 years ago can just come crashing back full force like they never went away. I can't decide whether or not to just bury it again and keep doing what I do. There's probably not a lot I can do anyway. The universe loves to play games with me.

My trip to NYC was really good. I was so tired at the end, but it was really good to see my old friends and a few new ones. I really miss my time in college with my band/friends. I started getting really serious about guitar again since December and am really enjoying it. After everything that happened this weekend, I decided to start writing again. Whether or not its a smart thing to do is still up in the air. Its been a long time and everything I was feeling really inspired me. I even decided to start chronicling my guitar, from all the songs I've written to all the songs I learn.

Its strange. This is one of the few times I really don't know what to do. Now I know why I don't let myself feel things haha. I guess all I can do is be patient and keep doing my best to enjoy life and keep doing my best to be a good person. Why is it we only worry about the things in life that we have no control over.