Confidence and dance

So I've been struggling with this for some time now. Having been bboying almost three years now, you would think I would have some confidence in my abilities...well I do to some extent. If you had asked me a few months ago, this wouldn't really have been an issue, but in my dealings in San Diego was a very humbling experience. Having tried so hard to learn the choreo for that one small piece and then failing to make the cut was the first attack of my confidence. Then while in San Diego, my one redeeming action would have been to really kill the cyphers, but I just wasn't feeling it, and that really killed my confidence. I kind of feel like I've been broken down to my earlier days of breaking when I had no confidence.

This I see as partially a blessing and also a great set back. Maybe this is a good thing in that it will force me to work on some things that I have been ignoring for a while in foundation, such as improving my footwork. And taking more time to learn new stuff. It is a great set back in that I don't feel the same on the floor anymore. Before I felt like I could really hold down the beat, and I never questioned my movements, they just came naturally, but now, I'm thinking so much that I feel really out of place.

This whole situation really makes me think about the role of confidence in dance. As with most things, it is a double edged sword. On one side of the spectrum, without confidence, you will never appear comfortable on the dance floor, you won't be in a groove, and people can tell by the lack of commitment in your movements. But on the other side, too much confidence and you become cocky, your style stops progressing, and you get a serious attitude problem.

How do you walk the fine line between the two? I know several dancers that do it quite well. Staying humble about your style is vital to being a good dancer. It is ok to know that you are a good dancer, but you should never fool yourself into thinking you're all that and a bag of chips. You will always have an off day, there will always be someone who can beat you, and there will always be a song that you just can't dance to. Hopefully all these don't happen to you at once. I think the next thing to keep in mind is to keep an open mind. From listening to house(the guy) a lot lately, I have learned a lot.

If you look at dance, every area has its own style. Every area has its own hero bboys/hero crews/whatever. I think one of the biggest trap to fall into is to judge an entire area of dance. Take for instance east coast vs. west coast. I can't really say what goes on in the west coast, cause I don't live there. But here in the east coast, everyone pride's themselves on having the best foundation/style. I let myself get caught up in that hype. I went to cali expecting everyone to be throwing all sorts of power and have no style at all. In a way I was kind of hating or looking down on them. I don't know why, maybe to feel better about my lack of being awesome. To make myself feel big. That is so counter productive, and I think that's one of the biggest reasons I was so let down. It was my own fault. Cali bboys weren't all about power, they had some awesome style. Are some bboys just power? Sure, but the same can be said anywhere. I'm going to stop listening to all that hype from people. Bboys are bboys wherever you go. There will always be some stylistic differences, but can you say bboys from place x are better than y? No...

I guess I'm just going to be extra humble for a while. I need to go underground again and work hard on my foundation and really structure the way I practice. I need to get comfortable with myself again and learn to just get back to the music. I'm going to try not to look at this as a bad thing, but a way to progress my style. You have to fall down before you can get up. Now that I'm a broken bboy, its time to rebuild, We can rebuild him. We have the technology. "We can make him better than he was. Better...stronger...faster."

Halfstep the humble